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Scrolling through dating websites a year ago, Indonesian app developer Lindu Pranayama realised there were a lot of married men looking for another wife – but few online services to meet their needs. They don’t see options for finding second, third or fourth wives,” he said. Enter “AyoPoligami” – a new smartphone app developed by Pranayama, which aims to “bring together male users with women who are willing to make ‘big families’. Loosely translated as “Let’s do polygamy”, the Tinder-style dating app has already stirred up controversy since its April launch in Indonesia, where over 80 percent of the million population are Muslim and polygamy is legal.
Muslim men can take up to four wives in Indonesia, the world’s most populous Muslim country, if permission is granted by a court and the first wife gives her consent. Court officials could not provide figures of how many people in Indonesia are polygamous, but activists say cases of men giving false information to gain permission and manipulation of women are common. The app has been downloaded over 10, times before it stopped registering new members following concerns of fake accounts were being set up, and men using the site without the knowledge of their first wives.
A new version is set to be launched on Oct. Iyus Yusuf Fasyiya, an Indonesian factory worker who has two wives, said he used the app to share tips with other users on how to maintain a polygamous marriage. The year-old dodged questions about whether he was using the app to look for another wife but said he continues to learn about polygamy, after he took on his second wife six years following his first marriage in The majority of the app users were men, but there were also about 4, women who have registered, the app developer said.
Lawyer Rachmat Dwi Putranto, who deals with marriage matters, said polygamy is “not that easily achieved” as Indonesian courts will only give permission if the first wife is disabled, ill or cannot bear children.
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Polyandry is another form of polygamy in which women practice having two or more husbands. Most countries that permit polygyny today are Muslim-majority countries. In some countries where polygamy is illegal but polygyny is still a cultural norm, and sometimes even in countries where polygamy is legal, men sometimes have one or more mistresses. The status of a mistress is not that of a wife, and any children born of such relationships were or sometimes are considered illegitimate and subject to legal disadvantage.
Higher incidences of adultery and prostitution are found in regions where the first marriage in a practicing polygynous society is postponed by males.
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‘Let’s do polygamy’: New dating app stirs debate in Indonesia
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Scrolling through dating websites a year ago, Indonesian app developer Lindu Pranayama realised there were a lot of married men looking for another wife – but few online services to meet their needs. Muslim men can take up to four wives in Indonesia, the world’s most populous Muslim country, if permission is granted by a court and the first wife gives her consent. Court officials could not provide figures of how many people in Indonesia are polygamous, but activists say cases of men giving false information to gain permission and manipulation of women are common.
The app has been downloaded over 10, times before it stopped registering new members following concerns of fake accounts were being set up, and men using the site without the knowledge of their first wives. A new version is set to be launched on 5 October, and will impose stricter rules on users including requiring them to provide an identification card, marital status and a letter of permission from their first wives.
The year-old dodged questions about whether he was using the app to look for another wife but said he continues to learn about polygamy, after he took on his second wife six years following his first marriage in The majority of the app users were men, but there were also about 4, women who have registered, the app developer said. Indonesia’s Women’s Empowerment and Child Protection Ministry said it was up to individuals if they wanted to use the app because polygamy is legal as long as it can be done in a fair manner.
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With a homepage featuring an illustration of a bearded man in between four women in Islamic headscarves, the site, argues its creator, has been designed to help smooth the process for men seeking more than one wife. Upon registration to ayopoligami. Given the stringent conditions, in reality most polygamous unions in Indonesia are carried out unofficially, and not always harmoniously.
In late August a second wife in the sharia-ruled province of Aceh fatally stabbed a first wife, who police said had approached her husband to ask him for money. People that have downloaded the polygamy dating app are predominately from Indonesia, but also neighbouring Malaysia and Singapore. Ayopoligami, which is also open to widows, widowers and singles, and is linked to a dating group on the encrypted app Telegram, has received mixed reviews from users.
The social stigma around polygamy in Indonesia means that such unions are normally hidden from the public eye. But Nurmila says the practise appears to be making a bit of a comeback, at least online, where she has noticed a wave of conservative blowback. Topics Indonesia. Tinder Asia Pacific news.
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The Dating App for Would-Be Polygamists: Controversial Even in Muslim Indonesia. IT’S COMPLICATED.
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